The violence continues…

I have to say this past Monday’s scratch attack on my hands is the worst I have endured to date.  Monday started out like most of our days but I could tell my 4:30 p.m. I was in trouble.  It’s not that Tiara was being worse than normal it’s just that sometimes I am more vulnerable, less able to cope, more tired and have less help.  All of those factors contribute to how much I will get hurt in a certain situation.

Lou had been gone since Friday working and Tiara hadn’t really seen him in 4 days which makes her really anxious.  On top of that her caretaker was gone for the day and she didn’t receive a visit from either grandmother and Tabitha was working late so it was just me, me and more me.  In the late afternoon I could feel the storm brewing and sent Lou a text which read something like this:

“I really need you to come home.  Erin isn’t here and Tabitha is working late.  I won’t make it for the 4th night in a row with her. I’m losing it.”

He responded “Ok.”

After an early dinner he still wasn’t home and Tiara made a run for the side of the house in an attempt to escape.  I went to get her and she was laying on the cement next to a pile of her own poop.  I yelled for Trinity but she couldn’t hear me.  I begged her for about 10 minutes to get up and come inside so I could clean her up, but she wouldn’t budge.  I was going to make a run for the baby wipes but I knew she would get up the second I walked away and step in the poop.  I finally got so frustrated I decided to hose her down.  I literally sprayed the poop off of her and the ground with the hose and guess what?  She jumped up and ran inside.  Tabitha taught me that technique, I forget to use it.  Works really well.

Once I got her cleaned up and showered I checked my phone and saw that Lou had texted me.  “Leaving soon!”  What?   He hasn’t left yet and he works an hour away from home and it was already 6:15p.m.  I knew this wasn’t good.  I decided to give up trying to finish any type of cleaning and just keep my eye on her until he got home.  I sat on the swing and was watching her play basketball when all of the sudden she made a run for the other side of the house.  That gate was locked with a bolt so I knew she couldn’t get out, but she was crying for her Dad to come home.  She finally came back and plopped down on the swing next to me and that is when I saw it.  Poop was pouring out of the top of her diaper and smeared all over the swing.

me:  “OMG, TT, get up, get up!  I have to clean you.”

It was at that moment when I tried to get her off the swing and onto the ground so I could clean her off, she went crazy.  She started fighting me and there was poop everywhere.  I didn’t know what to do because she had poop on her hands and feet and I knew if I let her go she would grab my hair and I just couldn’t take having poop smeared all over my body and hair. 

 

So instead I just held onto her hands with all my might and cried for Trinity to call Lou.  She called him and he said he was down the street, so I knew I could just wait it out.  The problem is that she kept digging her nails into every part of my hand to try and get away.  By this time I was sobbing hysterically and Trinity was watching in horror as my hands were covered in blood.  I know better than to cry because it agitates Tiara more but sometimes I just can’t help it.

Lou finally came running in the rescue me.  As Tiara was hurting me she kept saying “Sorry Mom, Sorry Mom.”   She knew she was hurting me but she just couldn’t stop.  Once I cleaned the poop from between my toes and washed up, Trinity took care of all my cuts with Neosporin and Lou dealt with Tiara.

I know today will be better because Erin is back, my mother in law already came to visit and it is Lou’s day off so I should be safe.  I will tell you tomorrow about what is happening on Thursday to which I am beyond dreading.

Have a great day!

xoxo tiffani