I hate feeling like this!!!

I hate when I feel just blah.  I am pretty sure it is hormonally related because now that I am on my 7th month of blogging I am noticing a pattern with my moods.  Maybe it is the weather?  I mean how muggy and gross can it get?  Trinity got out of school at noon again today and I was like, now what?  Volleyball hasn’t started, homework hasn’t started, Tiara’s home teaching has started, but it feels like summer is over, so what to do?  I went for a walk this morning and my stomach is still hanging over my waistband, another annoyance.  I always gain 5 pounds in the summer and once September hits I cut the sweets back out and start back on my healthy routine.  Oh, maybe I am going through sugar withdrawals? I didn’t eat enough sugar to withdraw from, but I did mow a very large piece of cake on Sunday.  Hummm

Back to today, after I made Trinity and Tiara lunch I said to Trinity, ” I am so bored, what should we do?”  She looked at me shocked and said ” I have never heard you say you are bored Mom, that is so weird.  Let’s go to the movies.”  The truth is I have a million things I can always come up with to do, so I am never bored, but sometimes all those stupid errands, cleaning out closets, cleaning the garage, weeding the garden, getting the crayon off the walls, organizing my photos on the computer, etc, seem so boring. 

I didn’t even feel like working on my blog.  I actually wrote a post for today, read it and thought, “ugh, how boring!”  I decided, forget it, I will just skip the post and take a day off.  Fifteen minutes later I was back at the computer and decided I will just write what is on my mind, not that you really want to hear about it, but oh well.

On second thought, my mood could be coming from the fact that it is my 43rd birthday next Tuesday, yes September 11, the worst day in our Country’s history.  Everyone in my family keeps asking me what we are doing and what days I am available to do stuff.  Well, after my walk with TT I am pretty free if you want to come over to our house.  How depressing is that?

When I was young my birthday would sometimes fall on the first or second day of school and that was kinda of a bummer.  Then in college I loved my birthday because sorority rush was over, school had started and everyone was in the mood to celebrate, so we always had tons of fun.

As an adult, I have never been a fan of my birthday and I usually get really grumpy around it and am rather impossible to deal with.  This year I am already dreading the day because my Mom and Tabitha are both working on my actual birthday and I always eat lunch with my Mom on that day and Lou works open to close.  So, I am planning on having lunch with a good friend, but I haven’t even arranged for a babysitter and I told her to be prepared to eat take out at my house as an alternative.  See, really sucks, am I bringing you down with me?  Sorry.

And last but not least I made this decision to do something really dramatic for my birthday and I have told everyone in my family.  I keep having bad dreams about this thing.  I usually don’t remember any of my dreams but for the past few days  I remember and they are scary.  This thing which you will find out about next Tuesday, is totally voluntary and the only person in my family who likes the idea is Tabitha.  My Mom, my Dad, my sister, Louie, Trinity and Tiara think it is crazy, yet I am still doing it and am very nervous.  It is not life threatening and not permanent but totally outside my comfort zone.  If it wasn’t for my blog, I would never have even considered the idea, but I thought my readers would think it was fun and might encourage them to mix it up in their own life.  So once commit, that is it, no turning back.

So enough with the hints, and my crappy mood, off to drink my wine and start reading a really stupid trashy novel tonight before bed.  Nicholas Sparks or Danielle Steele always cheer me up, funny enough.

Have a great Thursday.